The Praise Equation: Specific + Timely + Frequent = Connection That Lasts (Part 3)

How Often Should I Praise My Toddler?

The Power of Frequent, Intentional Affirmation

Some parents worry that too much praise might spoil their child or make them dependent on external validation. But toddlers are still learning what’s expected, what’s valued, and how to navigate their world.

⚠️ The Pitfall: Sparing Praise

When praise is rare or reserved for “exceptional” behavior, toddlers may:

• Feel unsure about what’s encouraged

• Seek attention through misbehavior

• Miss out on emotional connection and confidence-building

  
  

🔄 The Shift: Frequent Praise

PCIT encourages frequent, intentional praise—especially during moments of calm, cooperation, and everyday effort. Think of it like brushing teeth: you don’t wait for cavities to start brushing. You do it daily to maintain health. Praise works the same way—it’s preventive, not just reactive.

“You waited while I finished talking. Thank you for being patient.”

“I love how you kept trying to put the puzzle together."

“It's super helpful when you stay in your seat during lunch.”

🧠 Why It Works

• Builds emotional safety and responsiveness

• Increases the likelihood of repeated positive behaviors

• Balances correction with connection

• Helps toddlers internalize values like kindness and effort

🌱 The Reframe

Praise doesn’t lose power when it’s frequent—it gains momentum. When we notice and name what’s working, we help our children build a sense of self that’s grounded in effort, connection, and care.